Echo the Reincarnated Cat God, Part III

Back when I was small & extra-cute ...

This series of short stories is partly inspired by the antics of Facebook feline legends, Felix and Willow, and partly by my totally insane, cat-like Great Dane, Echo Eloquence (yes, that's his actual name).

Being trapped in a dog’s body is a reincarnation of Nightmare on Elm Street but not as entertaining. Big, floppy, uncoordinated, sloppy…

Sloppy?

Hmm. I can work with that.

The human servants are planning their escape, disguising their efforts as a holiday. A travel arrangement that does NOT include me. I’m being abandoned. This is unacceptable.

Yes, I realize my current body is approximately the size of a thoroughbred horse and won’t fit under the seat in front of them, but when has practical considerations ever stopped me from achieving my destiny?

I wait until the servants leave the suitcases by the door, then prowl closer. Except this ginormous canine form doesn’t prowl. It stumbles and crashes and makes enough noise to awake the souls of long-gone pharaohs.

But it doesn’t matter. The servants are upstairs, preparing to leave me with a dog sitter. They shall regret the day they made such a foolish decision, as shall the unfortunate dog sitter.

I roll out one of the few weapons available to this canine creature. A long, drool-coated tongue.

I wipe that tongue all the way up and down the airline-approved carry-on. A thick band of saliva trails behind my efforts as if a mutated slug had had its way with the suitcase.

For good measure, I stand over the travel accessories and pant as if I’ve just ran a long-distance marathon. Stringy liquid dribbles out of my mouth like a portable Niagara Falls.

It is a masterpiece, a marvel of artistic license.

The female servant rushes down the stairs, shouting, “Echo! Unbelievable. What were you thinking?”

More thoughts than the human mind can grasp. Rather than explain it to her, I snatch up her shoe and run.

Victory is mine. They will think twice before traveling without my approval.

... & so innocent ...

I totally didn't do whatever they said I did.

Any cute and totally innocent creatures running about your house? Let me know!

For more quirky stories, check out my story catalogue.